I hate Emotions

Sometimes I feel like the most lazy person in the world. I have tried to motivate myself to do homework but I always find something to distract me. I just got a 72 in Genetics for this reason. There was nothing difficult about the test at all... I just did not study. Ever since I was a kid, I tried to emulate my parents. Not only did they come from poor/super poor families, they now hold masters+ degrees. They got that far for the fact that they don't stop working. They are constantly progressing/working on something. They do take time to enjoy life and the such but it seems that every day, they do not regress. How!? I have tried to do this and it is so damn hard. I want to do all this cool stuff: be a doctor, have a great family, coach my children, travel to Europe.... etc. etc. and I am struggling to keep this idea in my head that I actually came from my parents. I'm pretty sure the lazy stork dropped me on my head through the roof and Voila! I have so many vices that hold me back. I have been searching for so long, a way to motivate myself everyday. It comes in spurts: after movies, after books, after exercise, after watching people piss away their opportunities with things like drugs. I'm not completely innocent but I have realized that they are of no use. If you are an aspiring artist that uses, can you really take credit for what you have made? Nevertheless, due to my hypochondriac tendencies I get daily reminders that life is fragile. We invent new diseases everyday and yet cures every 20 years. I can't let this slip from me now; I'm at my prime. I should be at my best so that when I can no longer stand, see, or feel, I can die with dignity(knowing that what I saw and wanted to be is properly reflected in the mirror). I want my parents to know that the promise made by me will be held and kept until I am in the grave. Volver. I was a last chance and they still counted on me, it's only fair that I do the same. Legacy. My creation, a perpetuation of an idea that was committed to with conviction that is infallible, unjustifiable, and omnipotent. Something that hammer and time can't touch. Breathe with me, breathe the same air as I and aspire the same. We can become the change and never fail.

The Fall of Joy

Garrr! I am spending the night at my friend shaun's house in order to save time and not have to drive so early from school but lo and behold I am writing a blog at 2:45 in the morning! Anyways, Shaun is a cool guy. His mother serves me curry and what-not every time I come over and well it is neat to be part of an Indian household. I actually went with Shaunak to an Indian wedding and well it was pretty damn fun. I participated in all of the food, dancing, and even the pictures. So whoever's wedding it was, I was in pretty much all the video and pictures they took. Anyways there were a few hot Indian chicks there and well dancing was pretty damn fun. I picked up all the cool moves from everyone else and I think I will provide some video later on. Nonetheless, I think everyone should try some Indian food at some point or another. They are mostly vegetarians and therefore come up with some creative plates to serve. I had like a goat cheese with spices and pita bread... it was good! So the girl for today (I may do this every time because I have so many interests in girls, that I could name one for each blog) is a girl named Roxanne. Roxxxxxxxxxxanne is apparently very difficult to find. She is mexican and coincidentally in the Association of Mexican American Students or AMAS. The thing about her is that she has that natural mexican beauty. This at first turned me off because I got really tired of all the mexican people where I grew up. They were always the ones who were stupid in class, always the ones shooting people and shooting up, they just stand for a thing that I am completely against and have come to hate. Anyways, Roxanne seems like she is not like that at all. She is not slutty, dresses conservatively (but nicely), no hoop earrings, no strange color sandblasted jeans, and no black bra under white shirt things going on. Inasmuch, I can't find her on facebook, myspace etc. so that I can send her a message. So it sounds like this one is going to be a manual solo mission... but I still don't know if she is interested in me or maybe she thinks that I am too white... maybe I am not mexican enough for her. Anyways, she looks good in what she is in and it has been a long time since I have dated a mexican girl. The next AMAS meeting is this friday and I paid my dues and cut my hair and well... I should ask her out! But details on that later... Right now I have an organic chemistry test that I need to study for on Friday and a lab with a Bag of Bones of a teacher on Thursday. But world, life should be sweet. We should fall in love, get hurt, be ridiculous and awkward, and everything else associated with all that. But always remember what Regina says: "You can write but you can't edit" Enlarge your world!

Hello World. So I got up at 5:30 a.m. yesterday to study for my genetics exam. Everything was ok and I had my usual $5.02 breakfast at school (which consists of fruit, yogurt, eggs, sausage and french toast sticks). I went to French class and there she was! I talked to her in the hall just on whatever topic. She sat down 2 seats closer to me that class. I was leaving with some other friends in class and I turn around and say "see you later Kendra" of course with my lion like courage it came out pretty much as a whisper and she didn't even hear me ha! I sounded like a fool to all the other people that looked at me. Don't I look like Ray Charles in this pic? ------------------------------------->
Needless to say I went to my Genetics test feeling foolish because I never asked her out. So then I go to Genetics and find out that the 15+ hours I spent studying for the test...... was for no reason. The exam was stupid. Almost all of them were "all of the above" questions and well I guess that is good if I get a good grade. Anyways, all the pressure is off after the test right? No. I see Kendra again! She is walking with some guy, but he seems like he might be gay so I still have a chance. I kind of follow her to the library and I sit down. I am such a creeper. I was trying to think of some way I could bump into her and then ask her out. She is stapling papers while I get an iced Chai Tea. She leaves, I hurry but try not to run. "OH hey kendra, what's up" I kinda scared her because I said it really loud but anyways. We are walking to Ochem together talking. I ask her the dumbest and most boring questions possible and she answers them nicely. Then we get to our departure, the fork in the road. She tells me "have a good weekend" and I am dying to ask her what she plans to do over the weekend, or "hey i'm watching a movie this weekend want to come?", or "can I take you out this weekend" or anything involving her and I. I say "ok you too". Gah!!!!! I have no courage. FURTHERMORE, I go into my class, but then I went to catch her on the other side of the building and ask her out then. Well she was gone and so are my chances of doing anything fun this weekend with a girl. Oh well, I guess it means more Gears of War and non-relationship friends this weekend. That's all, I thought I would share the details (or lack of) about asking Kendra out. So far I am 0 for about 7 on asking and getting the girl. Hooray! I think I may become a priest. Well I may write another article this weekend, but most likely the next topic will be interesting. Here is the primer: I am looking for some Pepto in the medicine cabinet and I see a First Response.... 1 missing. I am helping with the groceries and see prenatal-vits... hmmmmmmmm. What is next? A sonogram in the shower? Yah, anyways keep it real.

Hey Now

You're an all star. Stupid smash mouth. Anyways, that also makes me sad because the same song was also played at an old teammates funeral. He was in the wrong place, good kid though. Anyways, what a great way to start a blog... Hey world, I hope someone reads this and finds it interesting. My name is Jayce Q. Rodriguez and I am Mexican as my awesome and groovy friend Kimri says I am. I am in my Senior ish year at this school in Arlington, Texa$. Texa$ is way to humid in the summers and I cannot find my type of woman here.... but I do see a bunch of this. But I think it is funny that I have found so many girls despite this, but almost every time there is something that happens: studying for the MCAT(lame), have boyfriend, bad kissers(don't ask), and have herpes. HA! Ok that last one wasn't true. I have high standards that probably prevent me from getting a gf anyways. Oh well, college has always been there for me... Ok back to my real life. I have an older brother and two fantastic parents whom I model my life after. It is really difficult to keep up with them by the way. I live in Ft. Worth with my brother and his gf who moved in and they got dogs and rings and she moved all her stuff in and some how snuck tampons in my bathroom. I kinda feel like giving myself the boot and moving on campus or something but well long story. I'm 21 and I drink sometimes, but I actually like the taste of a good beer and getting drunk really isn't all that cool. It costs too much and you feel like crap afterwards+ you look like an idiot the whole time. No thanks. I lived in Arizona and made a ton of great friends who happened to be Mormon and well it wasn't that bad. Everyone thinks that Mormons are crazy, and they are, but I still hung out with them (which included going to bales of cotton and jumping on them, dancing with BOM space between two people, and other various activities). I also must add that even though I never converted or thought of it, the Mormon community had very convincing advertisement (in the form of some beautiful females). I won't name names even though they won't read this, but it is just pointless to tell any blog readers. I am finally making friends after a year at UTA and well it is not so bad now. Many of my friends are not cuacasian but I study all the time so I guess Indians and Asians are they only friends I would have ha! I usually don't hang around at home because I am out studying or doing some volunteer junk and the fact that mon frere et sa petite ami ont un probleme mal avec quelque chose. I am minoring in French! and majoring in Biology. I hope to be a Psychiatrist someday and hopefully change the world. I have many problems with the way things are right now and in some blog I will tell all about it. But now, I have to get up in 5 or so hours so that I can study for my Organic Chem. Lab Practical and my Genetics exam! Hooray! Then I plan on asking this chick out to see a movie with me. It really doesn't matter which one considering I haven't really dated or kissed a girl since I went to Albuquerque, NM for a short break. Anyways, I hope she says yes, she has some good fashion sense and she is 22 but she looks younger than me and she is a tutor for children, and an artist. It sounds like an interesting mixture to me. Her name is Kendra and that is pretty much all I know about her. I think I will give details next time when I find out more about her (fingers crossed). Anyways, if you like cool music you should check out the Prototypes they are neat. peace.